Navigating the great expanse
Taking us into another moment in Calvary, we follow Sonia on her visits to parents whose health is failing. She wants to understand what they're experiencing, to be with them through their fears. But as her questions continue to be redirected to their ailments and cravings, she falls in with their lead.
Surprisingly, a trip planned in my personal life while I was writing the chapter offered a glimpse into what they might be feeling at a deeper level.
The previous visit to these good friends had been less than a year earlier, so I was taken back by the change in the husband's stamina. It was also clear that he was scared, and struggling to accept the recent limitations. A brilliant mind, he’s always walked in full understanding of how energy works.
I thought how lucky he is for having a partner who is on his plane of thinking. The three of us have had some interesting conversations with imagining the new forms our energies might take. His present frustration was in thinking that he would not be privy to the transformation with his human eyes. His wife tried to offer comfort. “As long as we know that we go back to the vast realm of energy that gives us our life, should that really matter?"
"You’re a man of faith and science," I reminded him, "you know well that we’ll all meet again.”
“Yes,” he replied “That’s not what troubles me. What gives me melancholy is that I don’t know if I will remember this life; if I will recognize coming back as a return, and I think I want to.”
“Hopefully, you'll come to terms with that. For now need you here with us.”
“Well,” he reflected further, “perhaps in the big picture it doesn't matter.” However, when I left, he was still looking as though the matter hadn’t been resolved inside his fertile mind.
Days after my return to the city, a message from my friend put me at ease. “Some time after you left, I gave more thought to the conversation we three had. And, I've since decided to take back my lead in ping pong and use the talk we had to stir the conversation around the table. I'm thinking of opening my serve with a new spin, ‘it just doesn’t matter!' "